Mustard Seed Faith

This is the letter I sent out to several respected friends and family members.

Hi friends, I am sorry that I am sending out a group email instead of talking to each of you individually (that would of course be my preference). The reason I am sending you this email is because I respect your Godly counsel and I covet your prayers.

Since April earlier this year, I have felt that the Lord is moving in my life, preparing me for a new season. At that time, I could not say what it was, but I felt it strongly enough to put my studies on hold (I had just finished with all of my preparatory classes and am now cleared to begin an MBA program without having to take any BA level courses), and seek the Lord. After fasting and much prayer, I sensed that the next season of my life was one of equipping and ministry -- a passion and calling that I had put on the farthest back burner. The next couple of months I continued fasting regularly and praying. I grew frustrated with myself and could not understand how I should minister when I felt so ill-equipped and clueless. It was on a road trip to Seattle when a friend asked me about what was going on in my life that I was able to express how I wanted to serve the Lord in a ministry setting, but I had no idea how to do it. I wanted to be discipled, to be mentored. She was in the same boat and mentioned how her church was starting a year-long Discipleship Training Program (DTP) that would both disciple, equip and mentor men and women for ministry within the church and outreach in the communities. She sent me the information and I went back home to California.

The DTP kept coming back to my mind -- Seattle resonated in my heart long beforehand as a place that felt like home (reminds me so much of Norway...and the rainy cold weather delights me), the opportunity to work in a bustling city (but without the painful baggage that I have from living in Oakland), and the promise of guidance and mentoring every step of the way -- I applied at the very last minute on the day of the deadline.

I did not hear from Mars Hill for quite a long time and I wondered if they had lost my application or disqualified me based on personality, distance, or any other number of factors. Finally, on August 2nd, they sent me an email requesting references and letting me know that they would notify participants of their acceptance on August 9th and that the Program officially begins on August 16th.

I got an acceptance from West Seattle's campus of Mars Hill Church on Sunday, the 9th. I have to admit that I freaked out just a little -- a week til start-up and me in the Bay Area surrounded by looming responsibilities and commitments. After exchanging several emails with the leaders and my mentor team, they granted me an extension on starting so that I could honor my commitments and transition up to the Northwest. Ideally, the goal would be to have everything settled so that I could move by October 1st.

My prayer has been that the Lord would continue to keep the doors open that I am supposed to walk through, and firmly close those that I was never meant to walk through. So far, the door for Seattle has been open. There are still so many things that need to fit and fall in place before I can move, though. The reason I am writing you this email is both to let you know what's going on in my life, but also to ask you to keep me in your prayers. The Lord can use me anywhere, it does not have to be in Seattle. I want to be sensitive to the Lord's leading -- whether that is to the Northwest or it is to stay in the Bay Area for another stretch of time. There are practical matters at hand, too. I have to have a job if I am going to live up there (the DTP takes place on evenings and weekends), and a good housing situation.

Thank you for all of your encouragement, exhortation and friendship over the years! Thank you for praying for me and wanting the best out of life for all of us! We truly can change the world around us, one person at a time. =)

Love,Shannon


The past two weeks I have scrambled and have been striving (in every respect) to find a job and find housing. No job...no call backs...nothing. I ask everyone for prayer, and I pray for myself, as well. Gina, my assigned mentor at Mars Hill, sent me an email earlier this week and asked what kind of work I am looking for. I said that I was looking for a full-time administrator position. Her question, why do I need to work full-time? Puzzled, I considered. I spoke with friends who admonished me and let me know that I do not need as much as I think I need to live on; I must change my mindset. Amazing! They were all correct! Then I opened my mouth and inserted my foot. I expressed that I did not want to go from an executive administrator to some low-level job, I wanted something that would look relatively good on my resume. No one said anything, but later the words clanged inside my head. What was I saying? In essence, I was saying I still want to hold onto my career, and this ministry thing is just a short stint in my life. I felt awful and repented.

Today as I prepared myself to hang out with friends after work, I prayed that the Lord would provide the job for me, that He would help me to stop striving so that His grace would be so perfect and evident in my life. What did He say? You have to have faith in me. You ask people to pray for you all the time...but YOU have to trust me.

I need more faith!!